Friday, January 23, 2009

Honest Conversations

Wowsers, It's been awhile since I posted. A lot has changed. hehe. To catch the world up (not that all my readers don't already know, but hey)

I went to Hawaii.
I turned 22.
I had a fabulous time.
I got engaged.
I'm getting married on the 31st.
I'm going back to Hawaii for the wedding.
I leave the 28th.

There you have it. :)

I'm actually doing really well with everything. I've been super stressed, and hearing everyone's concerns doesn't help. But they have started to slack off on the comments and be more productive. Now we're on the road to success. lol.

I would have really liked it if Brandon hadn't been in the field the WHOLE time, but it can't be helped. I'm almost done with the planning. Never thought I'd say that. Really all I have left is to find some footwear for myself, the bridesmaid dresses and some ceremony music. I'm very proud of myself.

I also found the most beautiful dress. And would you believe it fit perfectly? NO alterations. Amazing. Fate I tell you.

So I've spent the last couple of days thinking about my life. About the past. Thinking about when I first met Brandon. I will never forget the first time I talked with him. We talked forever. I had such a crush on him the entire time he was there. I woke up in the morning thinking about going to work thinking about the fact that he would be there. Stupid, I know.

Even when things were not good, when he was into other girls and I was unhappy with life and my job and the entire situation, I still liked him. He claims he liked me, too. I would never call him a liar, but Brandon was in a bad place back then. Things were just suddenly changing and he wasn't sure how to continue. So he had a good time and wasn't concerned with the details. I was a detail.

I'll also never forget the last time I saw him. I'd bet he doesn't even remember. I do. He had come back to the store to say goodbye. I had just gotten the Jeep after totaling the Tracker. He came over to my Jeep while I sat in the driver's seat and talked to me. He actually talked to me, like the first time. Not like every time in between which was laced with sarcasm and sexual innuendo. Serious conversation.

That night I went home and asked God to tell me why he had to leave. I got no reply.

Over two years later I have finally gotten my reply. And I can't imagine it being sweeter. People haven't been lying all this time. The best things in life really are worth waiting for.


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