Sometimes I feel so lost. Like what am I really doing in this world right now? I look so forward to the day I have a job. The day I leave this house again. Regularly. People hear me say, Oh I am currently a housewife on a military base in Hawaii and that translates in their head to No Job, Beach Bummin' it in Hawaii. How could this be bad, right?? Here's your answer---Easy.
I've always been reliant on myself. I've always had a job, I've always had a purpose. Now don't get me wrong, I love my husband, I love being here with him. I love having all this time we won't get back. But I am missing feeling important. I am missing feeling needed. I am missing feeling productive. Like I could look at something and make it happen. Or I could look at something I did and be proud of what I accomplished. What do I accomplish now? Laundry. Whoo Hoo, let's throw a parade. Ugh.
It's lonely. And I don't have a reason to be lonely. I mean, I have a great husband, a sweet family of a kitty and a doggie. My hubs takes wonderful care of me and makes me happy. He is a wonderful provider and gives me more than I need, he gives me what I want. And he is here part of the time when he's not working, but I just miss that feeling of accomplishment.
I am not sure where this was going. But there it is. The laundry buzzer that is. Go figure...