Thursday, February 17, 2011

An Ugly Spouse... by the Blogtessa

I've been an active "participant" in this argument debate that has been brewing on another site, and the Blogtessa has stood her ground. I completely agree with her and I find it sad that this is the way it has become.

I'm sad to say I had already been thinking about drifting away from the MilSpouse community to a small degree because it is such a petri dish of bad behavior. I think this has been the nail in the coffin for me. No worries, I will still love you all and support you all, I just think I need to branch out a little and find what else is out there. Please go read what The Blogtessa has to say.

The point I want to make is this. You may think you have it worse because your husband deploys, but let me tell you. My husband has deployed multiple times and during those deployments, I've watched other people's marriages fall apart. I watched them complain and I felt sorry for them. I spent my time thinking how much worse they had it than me. My husband might have been deployed but I was the lucky one because HE STILL LOVED ME.

And the last point I have to make? It isn't respectful for a wife going through a deployment to insult a wife who is having a hard time because she is not currently going through a deployment. It's not right to insult someone else because they "don't have it as rough". How would you feel if you posted "I'm having a bad day with this deployment" and a Gold Star Wife posted "You should just be grateful your husband is still alive. Suck it up". 

Not a comforting thought, is it?

Thank you for reading. I'm sorry it's such an irritating topic. In order to lighten the mood. I'm leaving you with pictures of kitty cats. :)



  1. I couldn't agree more. I once felt like I should dive into the community and after a few years realized that overall it's a very small minded community and that I was happier being "me", out in the big world. I've met some really awesome military wives, and I've met some very ignorant ones... but, really I've found that there is no point in being exclusive with the military community, it does nothing positive for me anyway on a regular basis. I have my military wife friends, I have my non-military wife friends... but, in reality they are all just regular people. I don't think being a military wife gives anyone the right to deserve a trophy.

    I have no idea about this blogtessa stuff, so, sorry if my comment is off track.

  2. Thanks so much for sharing this Heather! Means alot!! :)

  3. Sarah, You are right on target. Thanks for your comment. And The Blogtessa is blogging friend who chooses to remain anonymous. You can find her blog at the link.

    I think you are totally right and the message needs to get out there. :) Thank you for speaking your mind.



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